Articles
Stunningly Awful Demos – Debilitating Demo Diseases - Part 1
Here is a compendium of debilitating demo diseases that commonly afflict sales, presales and marketing
teams when preparing for and presenting demos. We identify the major symptoms for each disorder,
provide one or more examples to aid in diagnosis, and suggest steps to a cure for each.
Conjunctionitis
Symptoms: Chronic overuse of “and” and “or” in the midst of demos.
Examples: “…and the next thing I want to show you is…”
Cure: Breathe... Pause... Summarize after each demo segment. Hold back from showing everything; ask
first before presenting additional capabilities. Peel back the layers in accord with customer interest.
Zippy Mouse Syndrome
Symptoms: Mouse movements erratic, haphazard; movement may never stop. Mouse may circle
constantly around certain portions of the screen. Customers turn away from the screen, get uncomfortable,
and reach for the Dramamine.
Examples: Watch other people’s Remote Demos (e.g., via WebEx or GoToMeeting) – time how long before
you get sick trying to follow the mouse flying around the screen:
Cure: Slow the mouse down. Sloooow the mouuuuuse doooooown…!
Move the mouse, deliberately, to the location you want – then take your hand OFF of the mouse while you
talk. Repeat for your next point. This is called “Move and stop; move and stop”.
In severe cases, change the mouse speed setting in your Control Panel from “Normal” to “Painfully Slow” –
this will compensate and average out to appear comfortable to the audience. Apply treatment right away.
Rambleitis - Run-on Demo (aka Demo Diarrhea)
Symptoms: No pauses, no breaks, no interaction with audience – often compounded by Conjunctionitis,
fits of Whooping If and Zippy Mouse Syndrome.
Examples: “…and the really cool thing about this is…”
Cure: Inject pauses at least once per segment, at the end, and repeat as frequently as needed. Treat
commensurate Conjunctionitis with the use of Biased Questions, designed to give the audience the
opportunity to interact (e.g., “Many of our other customers have found that the ability to ____ saved them
hours every week. Is this something that might also be of interest to you?”) Turn the demo from a
unidirectional, fire-hose-delivery presentation into a bidirectional conversation.
An older cure, still applicable in extreme cases, is to place the patient in an ice bath until unable to speak…
Whooping “If”
Symptoms: Presenter offers an ever-growing range of options, generally linked together by “if…” If’s often
multiply rapidly, causing great boredom in the audience and the risk of encountering unexpected bugs and
precipitating detailed, pointless questions (aka “Stupid Questions”) on topics of little interest and lower
value.
Examples: “So, if you want to open an existing one, you click here and…”; “Then, if you want to create a
new one, then you choose ‘New’ and…”; “Next, if …”
Cure: Inhale deeply. Exhale slowly. Apply a Biased Question when the urge to “if” presents. If you are the
presenter ask yourself, “Is this really something the audience is interested in or needs to know? Is this a
sales demo or product training?”
Death by Corporate Overview
Symptoms: Palpitation of the audience; sleeping audience and, eventually, severe audience loss.
Audience members doodle aimlessly, glance at watches repeatedly, furtively use Blackberries, and bang
heads on walls.
Examples: “Oh my God, no more slides…” “No, I’m not interested in their founding fathers, their revenues-
to-date, the geographic locations of their offices, and I’m really not interested in their mission statement.”
“Please let this be over…!”
Cure: Perform an immediate Radical Overviewectomy. Replace with two or three crisp, focused
sentences, e.g., “Good afternoon. We’re ABC software, we’ve been in business 12 years, providing
forecasting solutions to customers in manufacturing, high tech and other industries for over 2000
customers in 18 countries around the world. Now, let’s talk about your situation.”
In extreme cases where there is clear and extensive Marketing Metastasis, a deep cut may need to be
made into MarCom to help address the root cause.
Breathlessness – Demo Asphyxiation
Symptoms: No pauses or breaks in the delivery, followed by shortness of breath, flushed face and finally
passing out. (Fainting is often an outcome of Rambleitis when compounded by Whooping If and
Conjunctionitis.)
Examples: “And another really cool thing about our software is the ability to ____, or ____, and if you want
to ____ then you can click here, or if you have to ____ then choose this, and the next thing I want to show
you is our new import wizard, which has seven different options, the first of which is ____, which is really
great if you need to ____, or ____ or ____, and if you need to… need to…to… uhhhhhhhhh…” *Thunk*!
Cure: Breathe, fer cryin’ out loud! Put some pauses in the delivery; put some theatre and passion in the
delivery. Put some dynamics into the delivery (louds and softs). Reciting a Shakespeare play without
pauses and dynamics makes for a very boring experience:
But-soft-what-light-through-yonder-window-breaks-it-is-the-east-and-Juliet-is-the-sun-arise-fair-sun-and-
kill-the-envious-moon-who-is-already-sick-and-pale-with-grief-that-thou-her-maid-art-far-more-fair-than-
she… *THUNK*!
The lines from the play, Romeo and Juliet, are of course to be uttered with deep and fervent passion:
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief
That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she.
Here is a compendium of debilitating demo diseases that commonly afflict sales, presales and marketing
teams when preparing for and presenting demos. We identify the major symptoms for each disorder,
provide one or more examples to aid in diagnosis, and suggest steps to a cure for each.
Conjunctionitis
Symptoms: Chronic overuse of “and” and “or” in the midst of demos.
Examples: “…and the next thing I want to show you is…”
- “…and another really cool thing in our software is…”
“You can do it using our wizard, or this second way, or you can do the same thing using the menus,
or you can write a macro, or…”
Cure: Breathe... Pause... Summarize after each demo segment. Hold back from showing everything; ask
first before presenting additional capabilities. Peel back the layers in accord with customer interest.
Zippy Mouse Syndrome
Symptoms: Mouse movements erratic, haphazard; movement may never stop. Mouse may circle
constantly around certain portions of the screen. Customers turn away from the screen, get uncomfortable,
and reach for the Dramamine.
Examples: Watch other people’s Remote Demos (e.g., via WebEx or GoToMeeting) – time how long before
you get sick trying to follow the mouse flying around the screen:
- - Uncomfortable after 3 minutes: mild, but needs treatment
- Sick after 2 minutes: moderate, treat right away
- Really sick within a minute: Severe, emergency measures required
Cure: Slow the mouse down. Sloooow the mouuuuuse doooooown…!
Move the mouse, deliberately, to the location you want – then take your hand OFF of the mouse while you
talk. Repeat for your next point. This is called “Move and stop; move and stop”.
In severe cases, change the mouse speed setting in your Control Panel from “Normal” to “Painfully Slow” –
this will compensate and average out to appear comfortable to the audience. Apply treatment right away.
Rambleitis - Run-on Demo (aka Demo Diarrhea)
Symptoms: No pauses, no breaks, no interaction with audience – often compounded by Conjunctionitis,
fits of Whooping If and Zippy Mouse Syndrome.
Examples: “…and the really cool thing about this is…”
- “…and the next thing I want to show you is…”
Cure: Inject pauses at least once per segment, at the end, and repeat as frequently as needed. Treat
commensurate Conjunctionitis with the use of Biased Questions, designed to give the audience the
opportunity to interact (e.g., “Many of our other customers have found that the ability to ____ saved them
hours every week. Is this something that might also be of interest to you?”) Turn the demo from a
unidirectional, fire-hose-delivery presentation into a bidirectional conversation.
An older cure, still applicable in extreme cases, is to place the patient in an ice bath until unable to speak…
Whooping “If”
Symptoms: Presenter offers an ever-growing range of options, generally linked together by “if…” If’s often
multiply rapidly, causing great boredom in the audience and the risk of encountering unexpected bugs and
precipitating detailed, pointless questions (aka “Stupid Questions”) on topics of little interest and lower
value.
Examples: “So, if you want to open an existing one, you click here and…”; “Then, if you want to create a
new one, then you choose ‘New’ and…”; “Next, if …”
Cure: Inhale deeply. Exhale slowly. Apply a Biased Question when the urge to “if” presents. If you are the
presenter ask yourself, “Is this really something the audience is interested in or needs to know? Is this a
sales demo or product training?”
Death by Corporate Overview
Symptoms: Palpitation of the audience; sleeping audience and, eventually, severe audience loss.
Audience members doodle aimlessly, glance at watches repeatedly, furtively use Blackberries, and bang
heads on walls.
Examples: “Oh my God, no more slides…” “No, I’m not interested in their founding fathers, their revenues-
to-date, the geographic locations of their offices, and I’m really not interested in their mission statement.”
“Please let this be over…!”
Cure: Perform an immediate Radical Overviewectomy. Replace with two or three crisp, focused
sentences, e.g., “Good afternoon. We’re ABC software, we’ve been in business 12 years, providing
forecasting solutions to customers in manufacturing, high tech and other industries for over 2000
customers in 18 countries around the world. Now, let’s talk about your situation.”
In extreme cases where there is clear and extensive Marketing Metastasis, a deep cut may need to be
made into MarCom to help address the root cause.
Breathlessness – Demo Asphyxiation
Symptoms: No pauses or breaks in the delivery, followed by shortness of breath, flushed face and finally
passing out. (Fainting is often an outcome of Rambleitis when compounded by Whooping If and
Conjunctionitis.)
Examples: “And another really cool thing about our software is the ability to ____, or ____, and if you want
to ____ then you can click here, or if you have to ____ then choose this, and the next thing I want to show
you is our new import wizard, which has seven different options, the first of which is ____, which is really
great if you need to ____, or ____ or ____, and if you need to… need to…to… uhhhhhhhhh…” *Thunk*!
Cure: Breathe, fer cryin’ out loud! Put some pauses in the delivery; put some theatre and passion in the
delivery. Put some dynamics into the delivery (louds and softs). Reciting a Shakespeare play without
pauses and dynamics makes for a very boring experience:
But-soft-what-light-through-yonder-window-breaks-it-is-the-east-and-Juliet-is-the-sun-arise-fair-sun-and-
kill-the-envious-moon-who-is-already-sick-and-pale-with-grief-that-thou-her-maid-art-far-more-fair-than-
she… *THUNK*!
The lines from the play, Romeo and Juliet, are of course to be uttered with deep and fervent passion:
But soft, what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Juliet is the sun.
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief
That thou, her maid, art far more fair than she.
| The Second Derivative |
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| to go to Part 2 |